SHE WAS ONLY A CLOWN is a special serialized novella presented in weekly installments every Saturday. Click here to read chapter 1, click here to read chapter 2, click here to read chapter 3, click here to read chapter 4, click here to read chapter 5, click here to read chapters 6 an 7, click here to read chapters 8 and 9, click here to read chapters 10 and 11, click here to read chapters 12 thru 14, click here to read chapters 15 and 16, click here to read chapters 17 and 18, click here to read chapters 19 thru 21, click here to read chapters 22 and 23, click here to read chapters 24 and 25, click here to read chapters 26 and 27, click here to read chapters 28 and 29, click here to read chapters 30 thru 32, click here to read chapters 33 and 34, click hereto read chapter 35, click here to read chapter 36, click here to read chapter 37, click hereto read chapter 38, click here to read chapter 39, click here to read chapter 40, click here to read chapter 41 and click here to read chapter 42.
When Kiana came to, she knew only pain and confusion. The world was red. She was suffocating. She tried to scream but only bubbles emerged.
Water. Under water.
She tried to swim free but slammed her face and hands on some kind of surface. Ice? Glass? She was trapped. She could only see vague shapes and shadows above her. She was going to drown. She was going to die.
“Elwood!” She screamed out in a final desperate gasp before succumbing to the pressure in her chest and taking a deep, suicidal breath of water.
Only she did not die.
She simply breathed.
“What the fuck,” she said aloud. Her voice seemed distant and echoy. Exactly as though she was hearing it underwater. Which, she realized, she was.
And yet she lived.
The fluid in her mouth and lungs didn’t taste like water. It tasted acrid, of chemicals.
Her panic, only barely subsided, returned when she realized just how small a space she was actually in. Her shoulders bumped some obstacle on both sides as she tried to turn over. Her feet touched the bottom, her head the top of whatever container in which she’d found herself trapped.
“Elwood!” she screamed again, pounding her fists against the iridescent barrier directly in front of her. This time she swore she heard a response among those vague shapes and shadows outside of her entrapment.
“Listen to me carefully,” a muffled voice said. Elwood. He was here. He hadn’t left her.
“I’m listening!” she yelled. “Get me outta here!”
“I can’t,” the distant voice said. “Only you can. Listen to me. Your consciousness is trapped inside the body that the alien stored it in. You have to will yourself out. Just like I taught you in the mind-storm. Do you understand?”
Kiana tried to do as she was told but her panic and claustrophobia was just too much. “It’s different this time! That was… that was like a dream! This feels so… REAL!”
“That’s because it is real,” the voice that she was sure belonged to Elwood said. “I need you to close your eyes. I need you to concentrate. Breathe. Long deep breaths. Focus.”
She did as she was told, difficult as it was. Her heart hammered in her chest for another minute as she steadied her breathing. Then, unbelievable a tense calm came over her.
“Ok,” she said after a time. “I’m focused!”
“Alright. I need you to think of the happiest moment of your life. I’m not talking about killing, sexual gratification. Not the weird shit. I want you to think back. What is the happiest pure memory in your head?”
Kiana thought. There had been very little happiness in her life, ever. The only happiness she’d ever felt had been when she’d wielded a weapon to take someone’s life, or a cock to milk a hot sticky orgasm out of.
Then she remembered the puppy. It hadn’t lived long and yes, it died a horrible death at the hands of one of her junkie mother’s boyfriends. But there was that moment. That memory. The day she’d come home from school and instead of finding her mother passed out naked covered in some guy’s cum and cigarette ashes, she’d found her mom lucid, sober and holding a little Boston Terrier puppy in her arms.
Kiana had squealed in disbelief. “Is he mine? Is he mine?”
“Yeah,” her mom said, hacking and coughing. “Somebody kicked him out of their car at the methadone clinic and I scooped him up before one of those druggy monsters at the shelter could get their hands on him.” As though she wasn’t one of those druggy monsters herself…
The puppy had leaped into Kiana’s arms and smothered her with kisses. “Can I name him??”
“Of course,” her mom said laughing. It’s one of the only times Kiana could remember her mom laughing with her instead of at her.
“I’ll call him…. BILLY!”
“Billy it is!” her mom had said, before getting up and slowly making her way into the apartment. Which meant her mother was going to get a fix and pass out. Which probably meant Kiana wouldn’t get a hot meal for dinner that night.
But that didn’t matter to Kiana in that moment, because for the first time in her life, Kiana felt like she wasn’t utterly alone. She had a friend. A partner. Someone to get her though the long lonely nights and wake her up on the mornings her mom never came home from the bar.
Billy the puppy.
The happiest memory Kiana had.
Everything went white and an intense pressure caused her ears to pop as Kiana felt herself rising up out of the confined space. She gasped for breath and blinked her eyes trying to orient herself to having escaped the extreme conditions of the moment prior.
“You’re ok. You’re ok. Look, you’re fine. You don’t have to do that.”
Definitely Elwood’s voice. He was right. She kept trying to breathe, not realizing that the effort was in vain. No air came into her lungs because her lungs didn’t exist. She was an astral projection again.
She opened her eyes and stared into the face of the man who’d saved her life twice now. Maybe three times if she counted the mind-storm incident. It was Elwood alright. Only he didn’t actually look anything like she remembered him from her nightmare prison. He’d been meek and dumpy with crappy hair. Overweight and sweaty.
What stood before her now was something else entirely. His soul, she decided. His pure essence. The Elwood before her was tall and lithe with bulging muscles, not too big but defined. He was shirtless and glowed a pleasant yellow, like the radiance from the sun on a warm spring afternoon. His hair was short but thick and spikey. His facial features were more defined. A broader chin, higher cheek bones. His eyes were wider apart and no longer contained a hint of fear.
“Saved me again,” she said sheepishly, casting her gaze downward.
And then she recoiled in horror at what she saw. There, floating in what looked like pink puke was a hairless, dwarf-sized being with pasty white skin, tiny black eyes, and Kiana’s face.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!” she screamed, diving into Elwood’s arms.
He laughed, but did not let her go. “That’s you. At least, that’s where it stored your consciousness. Look around.”
Kiana realized she hadn’t done that yet. She’d been so mesmerized by Elwood’s handsome new body, she’d failed to take into account any of her current surroundings.
Her jaw dropped as she strained her neck to see the unfathomably cyclopean chamber around her. The red she’d seen inside the tiny compartment emanated from phosphorescent walls, ceilings and floors that spanned hundreds, no thousands of feet in all directions, ending only when the cavernous halls took sharp turns, hills or valleys, disappearing into themselves.
Every single surface was covered in those tiny chambers containing the same hideous little creatures that Elwood claimed housed Kiana’s mind. The place reminded Kiana of both the interior of veins she’d seen on the medical procedure channel and also a honey comb or ant colony.
She remembered a nature show about bees feeding their larvae that reminded her exactly of her weird surroundings. Wherever they were, it was the most alien place she’d ever imagined. And she wanted out.
She began to panic. Her breathing became shallow (no matter how many times she reminded herself she didn’t have to, she still breathed) and she tried to pull away from Elwood, whining and whimpering, jamming her eyes shut so those hideous little monsters with their black beady eyes wouldn’t stare at her.
“Relax,” Elwood said. His voice soothing even as his hands gripped her arms tighter.
She buried her head in his thick, hairless chest. She kept her eyes closed. “I keep thinking today can’t get any stranger and every time I wake up, this place fucks my ass that much harder. And not a good butt fucking either.”
Elwood laughed, but Kiana felt his cock twitch at her dirty joke. She mashed her tits against him, making them subtly larger again after remembering the technique he’d taught her in the psychic storm.
Her anxiety about standing in an alien larvae farm diminished as she thought about Elwood’s dick. She let her hands run over his rock-hard chest as she pulled back to look up into his face.
“We’re standing in one of its tendrils,” Elwood said, gazing around at the larvae pods. “Every one of them is full like this. Billions, maybe trillions of minds are trapped inside here. It possesses all of their accumulated knowledge. Imagine knowing that much about the universe. Imagine—”
Kiana stood on the tips of her toes and kissed him, cutting off his boring rant about whatever the fuck.
Elwood stiffened and pulled away, pushing Kiana’s shoulders back. His face was full of stunned surprise.
“What’s’matter? Don’t wanna fuck me?” Kiana asked, pouting.
“I— I’ve never…” Elwood stammered. His new hard body and handsome face betrayed him. He momentarily flickered back into the schluby creep from the outside world.
“You’ve never banged a chick before?” Kiana said, smirking. She tried to contain a snicker but only managed to turn it into a snort. “You’re kidding me, right?”
Elwood’s new form returned. “No,” he said, smiling, his confidence returned. “I’ve never even kissed one. Fuck, I thought I was gay but I’ve never gotta a boner from a guy either.”
Kiana looked down. “Well you’ve got one now. Not much of one, but it seems happy.”
“I didn’t think to—” Elwood said, his confidence again deflating at Kiana’s remark about his size.
“That’s ok, baby. I work with what I’ve got.” With that, Kiana dropped to her knees and took Elwood not-so-significant length into her mouth. She took him head to root in one motion, burying her nose against his smooth belly, forcing his small member as far into her throat as she could get it, which wasn’t very.
She extracted him, stroking the soaking wet member, a slight frown on her face. “I’m gonna have to try to get the cock and balls in my mouth at the same time, sugar, if this is gonna be any fun for me.” She deep-throated him again, but pulled him out as an afterthought. “No offense,” she added, before going back to work, easily cramming both of his testicles into her mouth along with his small penis.
Elwood grunted. His hands wound into Kiana’s hair. Her insults seemed to make him even more aroused which is what’d she’d been hoping for. She’d seen a look in his eye that betrayed his knight-in-shining-armor demeanor.
The gratitude she’d felt only moments before melted away. Kiana’s dark thoughts returned. The comforting thoughts. The only thoughts that had gotten her through her awful childhood and teenage years.
Fuck this motherfucker. She was no damsel in distress and she damn well didn’t need any white-knighting from a stranger. She’d dealt with plenty of those in real life, always thinking they could swoop in and make her life better. None of them realized, or at least none of them realized before it was too late and she’d ruined their lives along with hers, that some people simply enjoy being miserable.
Elwood gritted his teeth and began to fuck Kiana’s face with vigor.
That’s right. That’s what she’d wanted. The back of her throat was already beginning to throb from the force of his little cockhead ramming against it. A few more minutes of this and she’d be talking like a fifty year old chain smoking granny for the rest of the day.
But that’s when Elwood’s cock got bigger. Much bigger.
Kiana knew something was off when both of his balls popped out of her mouth. She’d felt dudes’ balls get bigger right before they came before, but nothing like that. Then she felt the sides of her lips stretch out as Elwood’s meat widened. A moment later and her eyes were streaming with water as his cock lengthened to the point that Kiana had to take in quick breaths from her nose as he pulled out because her throat was so engulfed with fat dick.
Elwood laughed as she struggled and gagged at his newly formed manhood.
He must have lengthened himself to 12 inches, maybe more. Kiana fought to pull away, but Elwood’s grip on her head remained fast. She was sure he was going to gag-fuck her to death when suddenly he pulled out and ejaculated all over her forehead, eyes and nose, heaving in satisfaction as he stepped away, leaving her covered in his spunk.
Kiana grinned, wiping it all away with her fingers, then sucking it off and swallowing it like ice cream. “Wanna warn me next time you’re gonna grow a huge cock in the middle of a blowjob?”
“Sorry, I… got carried away. I didn’t realize it was gonna feel so…”
“Now you know why I’m such a fuckin’ nympho psycho killer bitch, huh?” Kiana finished cleaning her face off and stood. “Kinda hot being watched by all these weird ass fetus people, too. I never mind an audience…”
Elwood regained his composure. “We can’t mess around. The entity will eventually locate us here. It has several parts of my mind trapped. It will be able to torture our location out of them, given enough time.”
Kiana ignored his boring talking. She’d gotten a taste of what he had to offer and she wasn’t about to let him off the hook for jizzing on her face without getting her off first.
“Blah, blah, blah. Fuck this alien motherfucker.” She sprang forward, knocking Elwood onto his back. “Let it grow a dick and watch. I ain’t done with you yet, virgin boy. I’m gonna pop your cherry right on top of all these little pig-fetus looking bodies and you’re gonna fuckin’ like it.”
She shoved his still erect dong into herself, concentrating on making her vaginal walls constrict as much as possible around his flesh.
“Now,” she said, smiling wide, looking into his eyes. “Just how big can you make this thing?”
Check back next Saturday for chapter 44!